but this one goes to 11...!!

doing: sitting out on the couch in the camera room watching it rain.
feeling: very "new age" blogging on my laptop! if only i had a fancy coffee to sip on!
listening to: the pitter patter (and sometimes loud thumping) from Apples of Gold upstairs.


i've been thinking about this alot for the last few days. actually for no reason at all, it just popped into my head the other day. about how our lives change so much, and how different we are from even just 5 years ago.

5 years ago i was 22, just married a year to the man i wanted to be with, getting into the job i wanted to keep and - wow - just bought ourselves a house! looking back i feel like we had NO clue (and we honestly didn't). but we did know what we wanted. we wanted good jobs that we loved and we wanted a house to have our friends over to and to start our family in. at that time everything seemed so simple. you get married to who you love, you buy a house and you live happily ever after. except, nobody bothered to mention to us that the "happily ever after" part doesn't come until you are like 40, 50 or even 60! thanks for nothing Disney.........

from our wedding day when we were both nearly 21 until right now when we are both 27 we've been struggling. it seems like a constant thing! if you aren't fighing about money you are grouchy because the table isn't cleaned off. then if you aren't fighting about money you are mad because the other person didnt find a babysitter for friday night! nothing seems to match up when its supposed to!

however much we gripe about the fighting there are the good moments, the in between moments, that is what really keeps us going. because lets face it, nobody is running the marriage/life race to be fighting all the time right? its those moments that keep us going, striving and living.

to track back to my title.... 'but this one goes to 11' for those of you who don't know this wonderful quote is from the movie "This is SpinalTap" wonderful flick, should have won oscars! i was thinking about this quote and how it would refer to our lives - me and Matt's - and would our lives go to 11? i think that at one point they did. we all lived to "11" at one point! we had to! as a teenager thats basically what you strive for isn't it? to live life to the fullest, to make your high school experience the best ever, to defy your parents whenever they got on your nerves!

as a newly wed couple, but also one that had been together for a few years beforehand, we wanted to live our lives to 11. because we knew that when we did decide to start that family, or our friends decided to start theirs, our lives wouldn't be 11's anymore. and let me tell you, as a 22 year old that is about the saddest thing ever. to think about growing old?! yuck!!

then we started a family. of course a new baby thrown a wrench in your eating, sleeping, functioning routine whatever age you are. with us our baby changed our lives and it changed our number. suddenly we werent trying to live at 11, we were happy at a 7 or 8 or sometimes a 5. lame right? but its not so bad. our priorities changed and that was okay with us too. we had this little baby that pushed his way to #1 for both of us.

now its 3 years later and that little boy is still our #1. its easier now to find a play date with Grandparents if we want an afternoon to relax. but we still aren't reaching for that 11. i think that our lives can be marked on that scale at a steady 8. we're happy to go out, but we're just as happy to stay in too.

i guess the whole basis behind my thought is that even though we all live at 11 at some point in our lives, we all eventually find that our number isn't quite that high. our priorities change as our life changes and sometimes as often as we change our socks! but in the end we find our perfect "SpinalTap" number that gets us through all of our ups and downs.